To further complicate things, my degree wasn't pointing me on any specific career
path. I graduated from a liberal arts university, which only carries with it the
ambiguous suggestion that I am a "well-rounded" person. To make matters even worse,
I majored in English, which at face value only proves that I indeed have a grasp
of the language I was born speaking.

After launching a job search for a myriad of different job titles from barista
boy to a paralegal at an ambulance chasing law firm, I finally found an ad for an
open position as a copywriter. I figured this might be one of the few times an English/Creative
Writing degree is ever put into direct usage, so I jumped at the opportunity.

After only a few weeks on the job, I quickly learned that much of what I learned
in my English courses had to be completely ignored. Thankfully, however, there are
a few other aspects of my education that have helped me greatly in my quest to become
the world's greatest internet content writer.

I will now share my findings with you in list form, because that's just what
you do when you write for the inter-webs.

Top 3 things that are now useless

1. Descriptions- You know the countless hours you spent in
   your creative writing classes trying to create
   
   vivid descriptions of places and settings? This is no longer needed for
   two reasons: 1) You can use images to show your readers what you would need
   to describe 2) People just don't have the patience for lengthy descriptions.
   Internet copywriting is about writing short, punchy sentences that deliver information
   quickly. So ditch your attempt to be the next Walt Whitman, and stick to the
   basics.

2. Vocabulary- Mark Twain once summed up his view on having
   a good vocabulary by saying, "The difference between the almost right word and
   the right word is really a large matter- it's the difference between the lightning
   bug and the lightning." Mark Twain clearly wasn't an internet copy writer. 

   While situations can arise where one of your SAT vocabulary words would just work
   perfectly in a sentence, if it's too obscure a word you will lose some of your
   audience. There's a reason why Nike sticks with the massively successful "Just
   Do It" slogan, and not something like "Procure the Paragon of Athletic Prowess."
   Stick to simplistic English and you'll never have to worry about this problem.

3. Formatting- When you write for the internet, you've got
   to format your writing entirely differently. Paragraphs should not be more than
   a few sentences.
   One sentence paragraphs are fine, too.

Lists, bullet points, images, and all the other stuff that would have given your
professors heart attacks if you had tried to submit it to them are now completely
fair game. The more you can visually break up your writing, the better.

Top 3 things that still apply

1. Inspiration is Everywhere- I always thought one of the
   joys of creative writing is the fact that every conversation, experience, or
   observation in your life has a chance to manifest itself in your writing. Inspiration
   is truly everywhere when you're a writer, and that doesn't change when you write
   copy.
2. Excess Language- I'll always remember what my creative writing
   professor once announced to our class as we were editing a classmate's short
   story, "Right now we just need to get out the pressure washer and blast away
   all this excess language."

   That quote has helped me try to remember to be concise. Excess language
   can be a huge flaw, so be stingy with your words.

3. Peer edits- Perhaps the greatest part of creative writing
   classes is peer editing. You can never know if the outside world will understand
   your writing without having one of your peers look at it before it's published.

Every time one of my coworkers edits my work, I receive invaluable suggestions
that always make the end product better. Never skip an opportunity to have another
set of eyes go over your writing.

While it certainly is an adjustment changing your writing voice from academic
to internet, it is comforting to know that the investment in my education wasn't
completely made in vain. At least you won't be likely to make any of these

copywriting blunders. If you too are an English major and have found things
that you needed to forget or retain, leave a comment!

The post What an English Degree Teaches You about Internet Copywriting appeared first on Portent.

You’re about to graduate college, so in no time at all you’ll be a master in the post-grad basics. You’ll learn to dress up for interviews, even though you may wear flip flops for the rest of your career. You’ll learn that in the roshambo of the real world, connections always trump resumes. You’ll learn that every single character on The Office is real, and probably sitting next to you.These learning curves will be the cartography of your first career. Here’s some advice for grads about to make that leap:

Work in Marketing. When I was a post-college job-seeker aka waitress, my friends and I all dreamed about the two M’s: “marriage” and “Master’s degrees,” the magical terms that would deliver us from a life of fried onions and uniform flare. Little did we know there was a third “M” that could accomplish this brilliant deliverance: marketing! Why? Because we take anyone! And not in a bad way. Marketing is just a really diverse field in which almost all talents and fields of study prove valuable. At my Internet marketing firm we have hired ex legal assistants, waitresses (ahem), used car salesmen, and yes, people fresh out of college, all of whom have gone on to have inspired marketing careers. Best of all, marketing is a reasonably fun, reasonably well paying career field, so it’s a good first job for those new to the nine to five gig.

Think of your talent, not your title. When I started my first real job I was a copywriter, because my major was Creative Writing. Natural progression, right? Kind of. My mistake here was focusing on the conduit (writing) rather than the core talent that drove it (creativity.) If I had taken a step back, I would have realized writing was just one offshoot of the thing that really moved me: creative pursuits. Now, I direct photo shoots, help design web pages and landing pages, write sonnets and jingles, produce YouTube videos, and am generally both happier and more valuable to my organization. Moral? When you are job hunting, don’t search “Accountant.” Search “meticulous” or “detail oriented.” If you were a Kinesiology major, search “active” or “physical.” You could up being a store window designer or an event planner just as easily as a soccer coach or physical therapist-and be much happier!

1. Never say “I don’t know” or “I’m sorry,” if you do and you aren’t.Apologetic behavior is mistaken by young professions as humility, but really it is just humiliating. If you’ve done your research, present it confidently. If a co-worker is accusing you of wrong-doing, don’t automatically stammer an apology. Look into to it to see who’s really at fault. Similarly, never apologize for needing help or not understanding someone’s explanation. You’re a smart cookie, and it’s your superior’s job to explain things to you in a way you can comprehend.
2. Cultivate a valuable resource.If you want to be pricelessly popular in your office, there is a way to achieve it without going out drinking every night or typing everyone’s reports. It’s simple really! Just cultivate one valuable resource everyone else in the office is too lazy to buy, and be really generous about sharing it. In my office, I’m the Grand Swami of Scotch Tape, seated directly across from to the Czar of Kleenex. Across the way is the Sultan of Spoons. Sure, people could go by their own office essentials, but they never will as long as you are ready with a steady supply. Share generously, and people will come to value you as a priceless addition to the office-no overtime necessary!
3. Job security is any career where you can never know it all. 

   This may seem contrary. You may think that once you have found out all there is to know about your field, you will finally be on top of your game. Wrong. Once you’ve learned all you can, you’ve exhausted what you have to offer to your industry. I work in Internet marketing, a job where it is virtually impossible (har har) to know it all, and that fact alone ensures me gainful employment for the rest of the foreseeable future. As long as there is more to discover, I will always be relevant and useful. Equally important, jobs where you can never learn everything keep you challenged, dazzled and humbled-a recipe for lifelong job satisfaction.

4. It might take you up to a year to like your first job.“A yearrrrr?” you groan. Yep, a year. It’s dog years in school time but it’s light years in a career field. As college graduates, you are the babies of the job force, and your development tracks as such. Consider the cognitive progress between a newborn and a one-year-old child. Babies pretty much spend the first year of their life processing their new world, taking in new sights and smells (in their case boiled carrots, in your case ink toner), deciding who they can trust and who they can’t, throwing a few tantrums and slowly, surely settling into their place in the world. On your first day in the office as a newly-minted office worker, you may be blinking in a disoriented darkness, wondering how you left the cozy womb of college for this unfamiliar new terrain. But as the year flies by you will find your job-legs, shakily at first and then with increasing confidence, picking up the industry language word by word, until one day you find you at last feel comfortable, and realize that you were in the right field all along. Baby steps, baby.

The post The Only Career Advice College Grads Should Read appeared first on Portent.